They Don't Come Much More Sick Than You

I noticed lately I've been writing jokes about monstrous people and events. I don't know why that is. Well, regardless, here's some new stuff. Please enjoy some jokes about MONSTERS.

It's The Room, The Sun And The Sky.

You spend too much time in the first and you don't get to see the second because it doesn't spend much time in the third these days. So I got out of the office and went to the gardens downtown today. Best lunch ever. And a note to any and all bosses out there: I'm still on my lunch break; I just felt the need for some workday videoblogging.

If You Want Some More, Come And Get Some More.

Happy Thanksgiving. I've posted my set from the Loony Bin last night. It's very similar to the set I did at Othello's on Tuesday, with just a couple of new jokes. Someone was at the club last night scouting for a (I'm guessing Christmas) show next month, looking for "clean" material. I said to myself before the show "well, he's not gonna like this shit, but whatever." I guess "clean" means something different than I thought, because he liked it. Who'd have guessed? Anyhow, thanks for reading, thanks for listening, and thanks for all your encouragement. I feel truly blessed to be able to do something I enjoy so much and have other people dig it, too.

Have a second helping.

I Know Hapiness Writes White

Just so you know, I don't actually think that cops beat people up to feel good about themselves.

I've been writing a lot lately. That's what happens when I get unhappy. So, thanks to the disappearing sun, I've written about 10 new minutes in the last two weeks. It's not great yet, but it will get there. I don't have a whole lot else to say yet. You can listen to my set from Othello's this week. Listen!

Ah, That's A Bummer But We'll Recover, I Bet.

So, the Sooners lost last night. That means, sadly, that the amount of punching in Oklahoma went up last night, and will probably continue at an elevated level for the next few days as Sooner "fans" continue to "deal with their emotions in a healthy way." That's the worst thing about fandom, I think. I don't just mean punching, either. There was a dude recently who, with his bare hands, tore the scrotum of a total stranger simply because the man was wearing a Longhorns shirt in Sooner country. That's not right. That's unhealthy. Funny thing: the guy doing the ripping was also a church deacon. WWJC? It's strange to me, to have your sense of self and self-worth so tied up to an external entity that you have literally no control over. That sounds like a recipe for psychic disaster.

That's why I prefer to base my sense of self-worth on the validation I get from a roomful of strangers who may or may not even be listening as I try to make them laugh.

I apologize for the audio quality. There was some crowd noise, and I didn't put the recorder near the speaker, so, whatever, blah blah blah. I guess we raised some money to keep the Tornado Alley Roller Girl league in the black, and isn't that what it's all about? I think it should have been a sanctioned Centennial Activity, but that's just me. Behold the magic of BUST A GUT!

I've Got Problems; I'm Gonna Use Them.

I saw Architecture in Helsinki last night. They were great. Glass Candy was there. They were great, too. Panther was there. They were there.

Awesome show.

I just got home from Othello's, where I did an entire set of new jokes. It's part of my new policy of confronting fears. In that vein, I also have a new haircut. I know that's possibly the dumbest, little-girliest thing I could say, but it was a big damn change for me and took me pretty far outside my comfort zone. So, there you go.

Incidentally, I'm very happy with the new haircut. If you're in the Norman/OKC area, get your hair cut at Behind The Scene Salon
24 West Gray Suite 103, between Santa Fe and Webster
405.801.2945

And listen to my set!

That's all.

Goodbye, Nate.

'Cause It's An Experiment. Experiment With Me.

I love this picture. It's of the WPA, one of my all-time favorite logic-defying experiments. The United States is in the midst of a crippling depression, the country is scared and weak and broke. Conventional wisdom says, "tighten the damn belt, wait out the lean times." Franklin Roosevelt said, "bullshit. Let's spend like we've never spent before. Let's pay people to build crazy shit like Hoover Dams, highways, zoos, whatever. And you know what, let's pay artists, too. Let's get someone to write a stage play about a down-and-out salesman, and let's get someone else to paint pictures of flowers that look suspiciously like vaginas. That's gonna turn this thing around!" Foul mouth aside, he was quite the visionary. And so in this picture we've got people building. We've got someone painting a picture of the people working. And we've got someone else taking a photograph of the whole scene. And I'm willing to bet that there is a writer less than a stone's throw away getting drunk while everyone else is hard at work. It was brilliant. And it sickens me to hear people try to denigrate the accomplishments the Greatest Generation made before they ever picked up the weapons of war.

The WPA kicked ass. Deal with it.

But, all of that nonsense is a way for me to say experimenting is vital! So, I've been experimenting with the jokes, lately. Here's the latest results of my mad science: Works in Progress, A'ight?

Enjoy!

Oh, and since this post brings me to a total number of posts divisible by 20, I'll list the last 20 songs I used for post titles. Check these people out on the ol' iTunes, or eMusic, or even an actual record store.

Oh, and check out the comedy show at Opolis in Norman this weekend! I'm not in it, but some hugely funny people are. So get ye to the comedy!

And I Swear There's Something Evil In The TV 5/17/07
“95 St. Marks Place” by The Sharp Things

You've Made It Pretty Clear What You Like 5/23/07
“Papa Was A Rodeo” by Kelly Hogan (Magnetic Fields cover)

Didn't Mean A Word Of It 5/25/07
“Moment of Weakness” by Bif Naked

I've Gotta Talk To You, But I'm So Sick Of Words, Words, Words 5/31/07
“Lost” by David Garza

It's The Same Old Thing As Yesterday 6/28/07
“King of Pain” by The Police

In The Company Of Strangers With Some Vulgar Shit To Say 7/2/07
“You Miss the Point Completely I Get The Point Exactly” by Harvey Danger

Hey Baby, It's The Fourth Of July 7/4/07
“4th of July” by X

And It Gives Me Something To Laugh About, 'Cause My Real Life Ain’t Fuckin’ Funny 7/25/07
“Can’t Get Out of What I’m Into” by Liz Phair

I Wanna Know What Love Is 7/26/07
“I Wanna Know What Love Is” by Foreigner

I Should Be Grateful, I Suppose, And Compare You To A Summer’s Rose 8/7/07
“This Piece of Poetry is Meant to Do Harm” by The Ark

It's Everything That Is Connected And Beautiful 8/16/07
“Kissing Families” by Silversun Pickups

You Can Surely Try To Be More Alive 8/28/07
“Fraud In The 80’s” by Mates of State

It’s Water, Don’t Try To Fight It 9/10/07
“Dear Sarah Shu” by John Vanderslice

Once Again, It's All About Me. And Pride Is Not A Factor, No. 9/11/07
“Moral Centralia” by Harvey Danger

White And Black, The Friendly Bears Of China. White And Black, They Rarely Reproduce. 9/14/07
“Pandas” by Corky And The Juice Pigs

No Telling How This Came To Be. You Ended Up Here When You Didn't Agree. 9/29/07
“Say Goodbye” by Papas Fritas

Sou Yo Kokoro No Nai Kotoba Nanka Yori 9/30/07
“Night Of Tokyo City” by Morning Musume

Anything Is Better Than Nothing. 10/30/07
“New Monkey” by Elliott Smith

Turn Down All The Lights. I'm Just Along For The Ride. 11/6/07
“Along for the Ride” by Mates of State

'Cause It's An Experiment. Experiment With Me. 11/07/07
“An Experiment” by Mates of State

Turn Down All The Lights. I'm Just Along For The Ride.

Saturday was interesting.

I started the day with a ridealong with a policeman friend of mine in small-town Oklahoma. I was surprised at the wide array of big city problems (read: drugs) that he had to deal with, and the ridiculously tiny amount of funding he had at his disposal. I was shocked that this man, who I knew first as a freelance graphic designer and photographer, would be willing to risk personal injury and death for a salary that is, for lack of a better word, insulting. But he looks forward to his time in uniform (he still does freelance graphic work by the way, because his family has gotten pretty used to being able to, what's the phrase? Oh yeah, "eat food and live in a home."). He's committed to making a positive difference in the community he patrols. There's a certain level of cynicism, obviously, in regard to the criminal justice system in practice, but the fact that he is still out on the street, knowing what he knows about "how the sausage is made," is amazing. I don't have that kind of devotion to anything yet.

I followed up that eye-opener with a first birthday party for the daughter of two of my dearest friends. If you've never been to a child's birthday party, let me offer a piece of advice: bring a kid. Or a date. But there's something very creepy and voyeuristic about being a single adult at a party filled with kids and couples. For the second time that day, I felt like I was experiencing a completely foreign world view. Four generations were represented at the party, and it was cool to see the connection between past and future. And I felt a little disconnected from it, like I was an observer only, not a participant. It is a strange feeling. I was torn between wanting to get off the bench, so to speak, and my more natural inclination toward introspection and reflection. But I'm about as far away from marriage and family as I've ever been in my life, and I feel pretty good about that. But I heartily applaud those of you out there who make it work, no matter what your situation of configuration. I hope, someday, to experience that kind of devotion.