As If It Matters

I met Rudy Guiliani today, and now I know that I’ll never be a major force in American politics. My first reaction was to moon him, but I was too pragmatic to do it. Instead, I smiled and shook his hand. I didn’t even bother to get a handful of my patented ass-stink beforehand. Also, I can’t say “Senator Brownback” without snickering. It probably doesn’t help that I’m a bleeding-heart-soy-latte-drinking-former-volvo-driving liberal in a state that loves Bush more than Texas does. I’ve never felt all that powerful in the whole democratic process, mainly because I’ve only voted for one person who has been elected to office. That was Bill Clinton, in 1996.

There was a really sweet time in my life when I didn’t care at all about politics. It was also the time in my life that I drank the most. Correlation? I’m not saying no.

I don’t drink anymore, and my apathy has been replaced with anger. The last two years have helped with that. It’s pointless to talk about the myriad ways in which my country horrifies me. That’s not helpful. What are we going to do about it? There’s Unity08, a nonpartisan (or rather, third-partisan) group on the Internet hoping to nominate and propel an electable centrist into the White House, or at least close enough to scare the shit out of the established parties. I can’t see a reason not to support their efforts. The disastrous policies of the Neo-Conservative GOP have done more to destroy this country than Stalin ever did, but the Democratic Party’s absurd pattern of Chamberlain-esque appeasement has not left them much credibility when they criticize the status quo they helped create. There are notable exceptions, of course. Farsighted leaders (LEADERS!) who had the spine to oppose the USAPATRIOT Act, to oppose war in Iraq, to come out in favor of a living wage instead of a minimum wage, to demand that government expenditures bear some resemblance to government income. Nowhere in there did I mention immigration, a national language, flag-burning, or gay marriage. Those issues, while worthy of discussion, are political sleight-of-hand that will never matter in odd-numbered years, and pretending that they are the fulcrum upon which our nation rises or falls simply makes me sick.

And that’s just another reason why I’ll never be a major force in American politics.

[Yes, I did liken the Neo-Conservative movement to both Nazi Germany and Soviet Union under Stalin.]